ah sunday night, we meet again.

here's what's been sloshing around my head recently:

~i am done with online dating for a while. i think. i went on two dates last week, both sadly unsuccessful. not like, 'aw shucks, maybe the next one', more like- 'this is just becoming sad'. i think i'm trying too hard. trying to force something into being that just isn't happening. i've met three guys in the past month. and they have done a good job of distracting me briefly. but they've also done a good job of making me realize what's a good date and what's a not so good date. and what i've come up with is what i was feeling a few months ago (at the beginning of the summer). i'm done with online dating for a while. it serves a purpose, but i just don't think i'm going to meet anyone i can date in the long term online. and while i realize that outside of the online world, i've had trouble meeting people in the past, perhaps what i need to work on is being more approachable in the real world. or just doing things to meet more people in general. in person. doing fun things. sooo yeah. new focus.

~running. i've officially decided to take up 'running'. i have some goals, both short and long term. but in any event, i've bit the bullet and tried this running thing (only twice so far) and think i might stick with it for a little bit. oddly enough, it was my therapist who said something that got me to actually start. i have been throwing this idea around in my head for a while. and i decided to do what i usually do when i set out to do something: tell people about it. the logic is that once i've told people about it, i have to follow through. and my therapist said to me "well, i bet you'll be good with that. you're very goal oriented, so i'm sure you'll be successful". and just like that, it was like she gave me permission to run. anyway, we'll see how it goes. after a few more tries i'll write more about it...

~my face is insane. no, like really, insane. without makeup i could scare little children with the breakout i'm experiencing. i'm doing everything i can, but ultimately i'm just crossing my fingers and hoping it'll clear up shortly.

~finally, something exciting has finally happened on the job-front. i have two interviews lined up! both are exciting and different, and while i have no idea what will happen, it feels nice just to have the interviews after a long time of no real prospects. so, i'll keep you posted. fingers crossed. i think a new job could be just the ticket to shaking things up around here.

so. here's the plan: focus on the job search. focus on giving this 'running' thing the good old college try. nix the online dating for a bit, and try to be more open to people around me. new things. oh, and lots of reading. cause nothing keeps me going like a good story. (recently just finished sophie kinella's 'twenties girl'- and it was some damn good chick lit. currently reading: 'one day' by david nicholls. 40 pages in and in love already.)