adventurelust

i have realized recently that there is something really nice about friday nights. i never really cared one way or another before. but really, friday nights are wide open. you can do anything, go anywhere, stay up however late- with the knowledge that you have 2 full days in front of you. for some reason, i've really begun to appreciate that lately.

of course, i usually end up doing nothing on fridays- bumming around, seeing a movie, watching a movie, reading, generally spending time in my sweat pants. but hey, that's my choice. it still feels wide open, the night actually seems longer. and i usually do stay up later. just because i can.

today i left work a little early. i came home to change, and headed to target, where i bought a new top (target is a good place for basic clothes, cause they're cheap) and some budget cereal and granola bars. i then headed over to the movie theatre next door and saw 'Adventureland'. i knew pretty much from the first time i saw the preview that i was going to see this movie. it was right up my alley, and not just because we have an adventureland on long island (i dont know if i ever actually went there), but because i am a sucker for movies about post collegiate lost-ness and relationships. the movie was great. not exactly what you expect either, there are some surprises. but i enjoyed it. not to ruin it, but it ends (well, almost) with a scene in the rain, a guy waiting for a girl on her steps. she comes home and finds him there. surprise! this also happened in one tree hill this week (oops, i just admitted i watch one tree hill...), and i recognized that i am not the type of girl who has people waiting on her doorstep. this makes me a little sad, both because i know things like that don't happen in real life, and because i'm the type of person to do them. to a boy, of course. because i like to pretend life is like tv/movies. a natural side effect of watching way too many movies/tv shows growing up. not that i've done that lately, i'm just saying. sad.

i also noticed something else on my way home. i only saw one movie. friday night, plenty of movies out, i had the popcorn, and i left after one movie. truth be told, it's been a little while since i've seen a double feature. i just haven't been in the mood. what is happening to me? i am the queen of double features! this made me think of something i remembered someone saying once (wow, vague much?). the moment you felt like an adult. no- this was not necessarily one of those moments. but i thought about this, and i feel like there isnt' maybe one moment. not for me anyway. adulthood comes in steps. sometimes they wax and wane like the moon. one of my moments, silly as it may sounds, was when i started blow drying my hair. on a regular basis. i went 25 years without blowdrying my hair on a regular basis, and the results have been some boring and some wacky hairdos. but having some control over my hair made me feel more grown up. and have nicer hair. perhaps slowing down my double features is a sign of change.

change that i am still waiting for, that i don't know how to make happen because i don't know what kind of change i want it to be exactly. but i find that when life is good, or 'fine', i feel monotonous and want to do something new. is this weird? am i incapable of just enjoying a good and stable life? maybe. but i'm not yearning for instability, just something new to think about, experience, etc. and spending 4-5 hours in a movie theatre isn't cutting it right now. but just under 2 hours for a movie about feeling lost and found at the same time, that was alright.